Are you a "lurker"?

I've realized something about myself. I do not like to lurk. I don't like the nature of it. There's nothing I can do about it. Just something that bothers me. Not that it's wrong, or dishonest, but there is something about it that puts me on edge.

I'm a member of a few message boards and I visit a number of blogs. They are there for socialization and communication. You are expected to interact. Not simply be. So, I interact. Until recently. Now I have to lurk. But I can't lurk because, well, I just can't. Maybe I'm too social, too full of myself and think my life might be interesting to others, too something.

(If you want to "lurk", go to Wikepedia, they expect it - no interaction required!)

Before I moved this blog "private", I had about 12 visits every day. Sometimes visitors would leave a comment, sometimes not. The numbers were always manageable and visits by people I know - know in person or otherwise were known to me. But, I always interacted in some form with those who visited.

The day before I moved this blog "private", two things happened:

I received over 50 visits from one person and at that point (well, that and a few other things) her "lurking" became more sinister and negative. Up to that point it didn't matter because my posts here are just that, posts. Small snippets of my life.

And, another person visited for over four hours and read every post and looked at every photo posted - for a whole year. Since February 2007 when I started!

No, I cannot gather this information from my software. But the authorities were able to gather this information from theirs. That is how serious they take "lurking". They call it "cyber-stalking". Why the authorities? See my Fantasies are great post for the details. They take "utterances" even more seriously.

All this because I invited the wrong person to visit. All this because I was not given a chance to decompress from that mistake. All this because I'm a complete idiot.

Don't be a lurker! Let people know you're there. Let them know why. Even if it's been said before, say it again ... expecially if it's a nice thing. Be forthright. Be engaging. Be fun!