Life is for sharing

This was sent to me earlier this week. It is a T-Mobile commercial (we don't have T-Mobile, so this is all new to me). It brought a smile to my face and I hope it brings a smile to yours:

Here's a funny

My sister-in-law, Julie, sent me this and I thought I'd share. Only because I don't often laugh out loud at e-mails and this one hit my funny bone:

"Whatever you give a woman, she will make greater. If you give her sperm, she'll give you a baby. If you give her a house, she'll give you a home. If you give her groceries, she'll give you a meal. If you give her a smile, she'll give you her heart. She multiplies and enlarges what is given to her. So, if you give her any crap, be ready to receive a ton of shit.”

Tea: Best After Stress

I love these ads. I truly do. They crack.me.up. Claire sent me this link. I've seen it, but she, of course, found it on YouTube.

I don't know who came up with this ad campaign, this ad series, but it is completely brilliant.

Brilliant!

Even better?

Check out THIS one:



I so enjoy these ads.

More fun? Claire is using her school-issued Dell PC sending to my MacBook Pro the links to the commercials! Not only that, but Appleby chose to use Vista as the operating system. I'm sure there will be interesting lessons learned this school year.

:)

I am spoiled

I was terribly spoiled yesterday. When Char first arrived she handed me a massive, really MASSIVE bouquet of gorgeous flowers! Beautiful? Absolutely jaw dropping. I love having fresh flowers in the house and these are a spectacular addition.

After Cyn and Char visited (with Marcy) last month - was it only last month? - my iPod speakers in my scrapbook studio just did.not.work. Since then I've been using the earbuds (which makes for some interesting moments when my kids come up behind me)! As of yesterday, I have speakers ... that work! Thank you ladies!

Cyn may not have been with us in person, but she certainly was there in spirit. We had taken a trip to Scrapalicious on her last visit and I saw these big jars of the Heidi Swapp florals in pink and red. I asked about white. I LOVE WHITE FLOWERS - on my pages as well as in my garden! Cyn remembered and around lunchtime the UPS man drove up with a box filled with goodies. Those goodies included THREE jars of the white flowers I coveted.

I am overwhelmed.

Thank you. Thank you both, so much.

A bit of Friday humour

Or, just in case you ever wondered how I feel about Crocs ;)

Found it!

The BEST Olympics spot on Canadian TV right now.

It has absolutely nothing to do with the Beijing summer Olympics going on right now, but everything to do with the Vancouver 2010 Olympics. I have been looking for it since I first saw it last week. Makes me smile every time I see it.

Love it.

You can find it here {clicky}

Enjoy!

Hanging on my every word

Oh my goodness ...

I just got back from holidays and slogged through pages and pages of the e-mails I was unable to view while away. That was quite a project.

Three funny notes came from good friends who all used the phrase "hanging on your every word" with reference to a group of women who believe I write this blog for them. Of my 250+ entries, I can honestly say that only a handful are in reference to this group. Months ago, I decided that they only make me sad and are a waste of my time. I don't like to waste time and really don't like being sad, so I don't often acknowledge their existence. But my friends do!

If they weren't so mean spirited and angry, I'd be flattered, truly thrilled, with the idea that they are "hanging on my every word".

Mind you, I'm kinda enjoying the powah :)

Have you seen this?

Oh my! You'll think twice about using your cellular phone again.

Check it out here.

UPDATE: It turns out that this - and the other similar videos - is a hoax. I've received information that claims these videos are a hoax, which got me thinking, are those claims to the contrary a hoax? Hmm. Colour me confused and happy that I use the computer and text more than I use the phone - home or cellular :)

Love me some Hell's Kitchen!

Gordon Ramsey is the best.




I have a question for the "contestants" on this program: Why would you venture into a kitchen with him in charge unless you knew what you were doing? Do you have some kind of death wish? A need to hear brilliantly funny and inventive swear words, swear sentences?


Holy smokes is it ever comical to hear him go off on some off those poor sods. My kids laugh all the more and call it the beep, beeeeeep, beep show!

40 Things You WISH You Could Say

My friend Lorraine sent this list to me yesterday afternoon. It cracked me up as each phrase got better than the next. As much as it is temping, I will refrain from putting the first name that popped into my head when I read each one. THAT was F.U.N. and number #19 almost had me on the floor!

1. I can see your point, but I still think you're full of shit

2. I don't know what your problem is, but I'll bet it's hard to pronounce.

3. How about never? Is never good for you?

4. I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.

5. I'm really easy to get along with once you people l earn to see it my way.

6. Who lit the fuse on your tampon?

7. I'm out of my mind, but feel free to leave a message.

8. I don't work here. I'm a consultant.

9. It sounds like English, but I can't understand a damn word you're saying.

10. Ahhhh . I see the screw-up fairy has visited us again.

11. I like you. You remind me of myself when I was young and stupid.

12. You are validating my inherent mistrust of strangers.

13. I have plenty of talent and vision; I just don't give a damn.

14. I'm already visualizing the duct tape over your mouth.

15. I will always cherish the initial misconceptions I had about you.

16. Thank you. We're all refreshed and challenged by your unique point of view.

17. Just because you are misunderstood doesn't mean you are an artist.

18. Any connections between your reality and mine are purely coincidental.

19. What am I? Flypaper for freaks?!

20. I'm not being rude. You're just insignificant.

21. It's a thankless job, but I've got a lot of Karma to burn off.

22. Yes, I am an agent of Satan, but my duties are largely ceremonial.

23. And your crybaby whiny-assed opinion would be?

24. Do I look like a f*cking people person to you?

25. This isn't an office. It's Hell with fluorescent lighting.

26. I started out with nothing & I still have most of it left.

27. Sarcasm is just one more service we offer.

28. If I throw a stick, will you leave?

29. Errors have been made. Others will be blamed.

30. Whatever kind of look you were going for, you missed.

31. Oh I get it . like humor . but different.

32. A cubicle is just a padded cell without a door.

33. Can I trade this job (marriage, life, etc.) for what's behind door #1?

34. Too many freaks, not enough circuses.

35. Nice perfume. Must you really marinate in it?

36. Chaos, panic, and disorder ... my work here is finally done.

37. How do I set a laser printer to stun?

38. I thought I wanted a career; turns out I just wanted a salary.

39. I'll try being nicer if you'll try being smarter.

40. Wait a minute --- I'm trying to imagine you with a personality

Very funny ...

A link to this was sent to me a couple of weeks ago from a "virtual" friend in California. She is lovely with a brilliant sense of humour and at the top of my "Must Meet" list. My kids have asked me to look up the link so many times to send to their friends, I figured I'd just post if for my friends!

Cole watched this clip once and you should hear him. Funny, funny, funny. Just imagine an 11 year old boy doing this whole schtick. The way he says "boyfrennnn" is a hoot!

The Effects of Hydration

I've decided to make an active effort at losing some weight. To all of you saying "it's about time", you're right! :) To that end, I've been doing a bunch of research. I ran across this article regarding the importance of water consumption.

75% of Americans are chronically dehydrated. In 37% of Americans, the thirst mechanism is so weak that it is often mistaken for hunger. Even MILD dehydration will slow down one's metabolism as much as 3%. One glass of water shuts down midnight hunger pangs for almost 100% of the dieters studied in a U-Washington study.

Lack of water is the #1 trigger of daytime fatigue. Preliminary research indicates that 8-10 glasses of water a day could significantly ease back, and joint pain for up to 80% of sufferers. A mere 2% drop in body water can trigger fuzzy short-term memory,trouble with basic math, and difficulty focusing on the computer screen or on a printed page.

Drinking 5 glasses of water daily decreases the risk of colon cancer by 45%, plus it can slash the risk of breast cancer by 79%, and one is 50% less likely to develop bladder cancer.

Are you drinking the amount of water you should every day?

Of course, too much water may have strange side effects!

Bwahahahaha! THOSE are some waterjugs!

Not what I'm going for at all ... at all! But funny, funny, funny nonetheless.

Flower Garden

It is an icky and gloomy day here. Drizzly, foggy, windy ...

I went to visit my favourite place this morning and Nancy had posted a link to this:

Flower Garden

Click, click, click and the promise of spring brought an instant smile. Caden was outright giddy and delighted with his garden.

Enjoy.

Heed the horoscope ...

This is my horoscope for yesterday:

Virgo
August 23 - September 21

Don't be surprised if you are scolded by people who are upset about the way you are handling certain things in your life, dear Virgo. Most likely, the people who criticize the most are the ones who understand the least. They are probably just on a completely different wavelength than you are, and it is not your job to try to change them. Nor is it your responsibility to change your ways because of them.

Probably the ONLY time I should have actually read, and heeded, my horoscope. I should have waited just one day to raise a stink!

Inside Joke

Every once in a while there is a photo that can't be explained unless you've "been there" or know the whole story. This is one such example. But funny nonetheless. This is me - the one with the big bazooms - and my friend Sharon at the Black Rock retreat in Pennsylvania paying homage to the brilliant Stacy and Elaine - who struck this pose in Texas.

Thanks Sharon, you're a HOOT!

Sloopy Chuckledoodle

I do love the ladies in my neighbourhood. They know when to

1. Call; or,
2. Send silliness through the e-mail

at just the right time! Yesterday, while at DD1's basketball tournament our team was losing by double digits :( - I received this on the Blackberry:

We all need a little stress-reliever! This only takes a minute. Please don't be a bore and ruin it. Sometimes when you have a stressful day or week, you need some silliness to break up the day. If we are honest, we have a lot more stressful days than not. Here is your dose of humor...

A. Follow the instructions to find your new name.
B. Once you have your new name, put it in the subject box and forward it to friends and family and co-workers. Don't forget to forward it back to the person who sent it to you, so they know you participated. And don't go all adult - a senior manager is now known far and wide as Dorky Gizzardsniffer!

The following is excerpted from a children's book, Captain Underpants And the Perilous Plot Professor Poopypants, by Dave Pilkey, in which the evil Professor forces everyone to assume new names...

So:

1. Use the third letter of your first name to determine your NEW FIRST NAME:
a = snickle; b = doombah; c = goober; d = cheesey; e = crusty; f = greasy; g = dumbo; h = farcus; i = dorky; j = doofus; k = funky; l = boobie; m = sleezy; n = sloopy; o = fluffy; p = stinky; q = slimy; r = dorfus; s = snooty; t = tootsie; u = dipsy; v = sneezy; w = liver; x = skippy; y = dinky; z = zippy

2. Use the second letter of your last name to determine the first half of your NEW LAST NAME:
a = dippin; b = feather; c = batty; d = burger; e = chicken; f = barffy; g = lizard; h = waffle; i = farkle; j = monkey; k = flippin; l = fricken; m = bubble; n = rhino; o = potty; p = hamster; q = buckle; r = gizzard; s = lickin; t = snickle; u = chuckle; v = pickle; w = hubble; x = dingle; y = gorilla; z = girdle

3. Use the third letter of your last name to determine the second half of your NEW LAST NAME:
a = butt; b = boob; c = face; d = nose; e = hump; f = breath; g = pants; h = shorts; i = lips; j = honker; k = head; l = tush; m = chunks; n = dunkin; o = brains; p = biscuits; q = toes; r = doodle; s = fanny; t = sniffer; u = sprinkles; v = frack; w = squirt; x = humperdinck; y = hiney; z = juice

Remember that children laugh an average of 146 times a day; adults laugh an average of 4 times a day.

So, from my neighbourhood to yours: Put more laughter in your day.