Sunday, May 3, 2009

Every Day

Caden loves a buzz cut. We chose the #2 buzz this "summer" but I can tell he's not happy. It's not quite short enough.

Each year my boy requests: big eyes, pleading voice; for a buzz. I hestitate. I hesitate because of this:

Yes, a bald spot. Not a natural bald spot. A bald spot as a result of a bed sore.

Yes, a bed sore. Because in 2003, Caden was in bed, in a coma, for two weeks.

Yes, in a coma. He silently went into the pool and almost - thank God (big G) almost - drown.

I hate that bald spot. I hate that it ever happened. I hate that I wasn't home. I hate that it happened during my first escape from our house. I hate that I think that it was an escape. I hate that it was my very first National Scrapbook Day and that it now taints enjoyment of my favourite craft. I hate that it hurts my husband since he was the one home. I hate that the authorities thought it was our "fault" rather than a tragic accident. I hate that it effects my children. EVERY DAY.

I love that bald spot. I love that my son survived. I love that my older children treat him with thankfulness, tenderness and joy. I love that he is my husbands "favourite" child, hell, he's the favourite of everyone. I love that he is so kind and gentle (well, outside a sport arena). I love that he continues to be fearless. I love that he is branded for life - the bald spot and the "salamander" scar - proof that he is strong and willful. Though that force of will might just be the end of me. I love that he has a wonderful sense of humour. I love that he shows us the "caterpillar" at least once a week. I love that he brings such joy and embraces life, fully. EVERY DAY.



Char said...

Huge lump in my throat reading this. I read it outloud to Sean and Jonah. Sean was speechless, Jonah had many questions. Many lessons in your post. Love you all :o)

Becky said...

(((hugs))) What an incredible story Lee. :tears: I can't imagine going through that. I'm so happy your story has a happy ending and you have come to love that bald spot and all it represents. (((hugs)))

Jayne said...

Goodness! {{hug}} Everything no matter how horrible shape and mold us into what we are and what we become. Soooo glad it had a good ending!

MidniteScrapper said...

You have every reason to cherish that boy all the more. Thank you for being so personal on your blog. So real. You are helping someone - at least me - that is reading your blog and needs this exact account of something you've experienced.

Donna said...

So grateful he survived with no lasting physical effects (apart from the bald spot of course!)

Thank you so much for reminding me to treasure every day with my children even if they're driving me crazy.

Creative Junkie said...

OMGosh, I had no idea.

Such a powerful post, Lee ... you gave me goosebumps.

It could have turned out so differently ... thank God it had a good ending.

L~ said...

Glad to hear the happy ending. Very difficult experience. A badge of honor, no?